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Friday, May 27, 2016

We Have Nothing But Fear Itself.

I used to believe a person could be both good AND strong, but the longer I live, the more it seems these forces are diametrically opposed. Either a person is good OR they are strong. If they are good, then they are not strong. And if they are strong, they are not good. What follows is that the strong abuse the good, and the good let them. In the end, everyone is miserable. But why is this so? I looked into it and found only despair.

First of all, are these "good" people actually even good? I used to wonder this back in elementary school when I saw kids getting bullied for no logical reason. At first, I felt bad for the victims. I tried to help them. I befriended them. It was only when I got to know them that I saw what piece of shit cowards they were. 

They weren't really good, they were just weak and afraid. It was their weakness in character, not their kindness that made them appear to be good. If you're only doing nice things because you're too scared to be an asshole, you're not fucking good. You're just a little dandy-ass bitch. These little fucks had no problem bossing around and humiliating kids lower than them in the social hierarchy. If they were more popular or stronger, they'd be doing the same shit as the bullies. After seeing enough of this, I lost all of that worthless pity for those spine-less pricks.

Then came the bullies. They were generally athletic and/or good looking. They wielded power either physical or social. They used that influence for enjoyment and more importantly, security.

Again, I got to know some of these people. I wanted to understand them, and what I found wasn't much different than the victims. Yet again, the main motivation was fear. They were afraid of not being liked, or not being strong enough. If they attacked others, they remained dominant. If they were dominant, no one would hurt them. It was pathetic. Tough demeanors hiding frightened little babies. They disgusted me.

In the end, it was all about fear. 2 sides of the same coin. Either they dealt with their fear using aggression or placidity. The differences between both kinds were barely distinguishable. It sickens me to this day to see these fear-raddled worms. 

I hate the idea that fear is mankind's chief motivator. Fear of death motivates us to live a full life, to do something important, to be remembered, and fear of others, of pain, makes us act shitty to each other along the way. So fuck you. All of you.

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